


who will untangle the knot is you

by leedsfeels



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Coming Out, Late Night Conversations, M/M, it's just soft, the word afraid is used a lot of times
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-27
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-06-16 23:51:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 942
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15448611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leedsfeels/pseuds/leedsfeels
Summary: chanwoo is afraid.





	who will untangle the knot is you

**Author's Note:**

> tittle from 'i'm not afraid' by holland

 

 

“Hyung.”  

  

“ _Hyung_ _!_ ”  

  

“What?” Jinhwan slurred. 

  

“Are you awake?” Chanwoo knew it was a stupid question, but he needed to start the conversation with something anyways. Jinhwan didn’t reply at first and Chanwoo thought he did fall asleep until the covers moved as the older turned his body on the bed. 

  

“What's it, Chanwoo?”  The phrase itself made the boy gulp, his nerves and mind shaking suddenly with fear, afraid to ask and more so, to tell.  

 

“I need to ask you something.” Chanwoo sat on the bed, glanced to the small sided lamp, then to the roof, then to the bed next to him. Jinhwan grunted.  

 

“Hyung...”  

 

“Geez, just ask it!” Jinhwan said, sighing afterwards. He was tired, he didn’t wanted to talk, but he always makes an exception for Chanwoo.

 

Seconds passed in silence and sighing one more time, Jinhwan stood up of his bed and without a single hesitation, pushed the covers of Chanwoo's bed and crawled into it. It was something that often happened, when Chanwoo struggled with something, Jinhwan was there, to hold him.

 

“I- I'm a-afraid.” The youngest said, voice shaking. He breathed by Jinhwan request, tried again after some time. “I’m sorry.”  

 

“Why are you sorry, sweetheart?”  

 

“I don’t know.” He replied and Jinhwan let a little laugh out, confused.  

 

“If you don’t know, who knows?” He slided his hand up and down Chanwoo's back, tangling his fingers in the other hair, cooing when the boy whined against his chest. 

 

“You don’t understand!”  

 

“Of course I don’t, I’m wise, but I don’t read minds yet.” He teased, pinching Chanwoo's side when the younger pushed him lightly. He let some moments pass until he talked again, “Seriously now, you know I won’t judge you, you can tell hyung anything, right?

 

 _Right?_ Chanwoo mind ecooed, and yes, he knew it, Jinhwan could never make him feel bad, not intentionally at least. But he still embarrassed and afraid. He took a deep breath again, turning his head up to look at Jinhwan, his heart beating faster when he noticed that the older was already looking down at him.

 

“Er... How did you know that you were... y'know,” he closed his eyes and almost in a whisper, he concluded, "gay?" and then buried his face in his chest again, eyes already watery because he finally said it out loud, making it even more real somehow.  

 

"Uh." Jinhwan felt surprised at the sudden question, but composed fast and tried to reply again, "I think it was pretty simple? I never liked any girls romantically and when i tried to kiss one, i felt nothing. It was that." He blinked and almost didn't register the words Chanwoo blurted. "What you said?"

 

" _I'm gay_."

 

Seconds passed and the only sound that Chanwoo heard was the blood rushing fast throught his ears, loud, his heart banging on his chest. Shit, maybe Jinhwan will stop like him now, maybe everyone will hate him and he will end alone, without friends, without his family, alone. _Alone_. 

 

He didn’t knew he started crying until the arms around him tighened their grip, the gesture making him sob and he couldn’t contain the tears for spilling out without control. Jinhwan hold him in his arms until he calmed down, soothing him with sweet words.

 

“Chanwoo-ah...” He tried to push the boy back only to look at his face, but he refused. “Chanwoo-ah, please. Look at me, look at hyung, _please_.”

 

Sniffling, Chanwoo turned his face, puffy and reddish, marked with salty lines of tear, and look up.  

 

“Ah, sweetheart... Please, stop crying, why are you crying?” Jinhwan cooed softly, cleaning the boy’s face with the tip of his fingers, only making him crumpling his face to cry more. "Oh, no, no! Please don't cry, it's okay!" 

 

After a few minutes of trying to soothe the younger and make him stop crying, he offered a small smile, looking into Chanwoo's eyes. “It’s really fine. I... I already knew it.”  

 

“W-what? How?” Chanwoo questioned him, chin shaking while he tried to make the words of the elder make sense.  

 

“I don’t know, Chanwoo, I just knew it. It wasn’t my cue to tell you or anyone.” He explained, caressing Chanwoo's cheeks. “I didn’t want to jump into conclusions just because I’m gay and know some things or whatever. We'll figure it out _together_.”

 

“Oh.”  

 

“Yeah, oh!” Jinhwan mocked, chuckling when Chanwoo huffed and pouted. “Aaah, you’re so cute! Hyung likes you so much!”  

 

“Oh my god, hyung! Stop, you’re embarrassing!” Giggling and face redded, Chanwoo pushed lightly Jinhwan off the bed, making the elder yelp, gripping at him to prevent to fall.

 

“You fucker, you can’t even be nice to me for 5 seconds!”  

 

Continuing to giggle, Chanwoo pulled Jinhwan closer, hugging him tight. After some time, after both calmed down, they separed and Chanwoo smiled shyly at Jinhwan, casting his eyes.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“No need to thank me, stop!” Jinhwan pulled him closer again, Chanwoo rested his head on Jinhwan's shoulder, one leg over his, making him laugh. “Yeah, yeah, make yourself comfortable and sleep, but tomorrow be ready to tell me everything about that boy."

 

"What boy?" Chanwoo questioned.

 

"The one who stoled your beautiful heart, duh." 

 

 _What?_ Chanwoo own voice ecooed inside his head because really, there's no one. No one with sultry voice and small hands, no one with tender touches and small smiles, no one with lame jokes and adorable grumpy face. There's no one, _right?_

 

Chanwoo already with eyes closed, felt at ease for the first time since what feels like forever, and in Jinhawn's arms, let sleep carry him to the sweetest dreams.

 

**fin~**

**Author's Note:**

> :( i'm sorry, i just feel too much about these two sometimes...


End file.
